August 2011

Wow, it's been a long time since I've been on this site. My last post reports that 2011 is going to be a good year and a year of change. Well for the most part, yes it has. Mitch, my youngest son finally got his wife and daughter out to Italy where he is stationed, he will be coming stateside though for a couple of months to go to Army Ranger school. Josh, my oldest son passed a test that I think allows him to drive a fire engine. Jennifer, my middle child that I had given up for adoption 28 years ago is firmly in my life. I've been out to Washington state to see her, my son-in-law, and grandson twice this year. We talk on the phone daily and most often twice a day. I moved from my one bedroom cottage in the small town of Hansen, Idaho to a four bedroom farmhouse a mile out of Hansen. The reason for the move is due to a series of events. My cousin was living with a group of people in another town who found out that the house they were renting was being foreclosed on. I, "temporarily" moved her into the backroom/laundry room until her brother got done with his lease on his apartment and then they were going to live together. Wellll.....he got a girlfriend, she and I found that we were compatible housemates, we came across a great deal for a four bedroom farm house, have worked for over a month to get it livable and here we are. My cousin, myself, and our four dogs(1 is hers, 3 are mine) now live in the country in a house that we just keep liking more and more. There is still some work to be done. We currently have a friend of mine working on the bathroom (which was disgusting) and we have two spare bedroom to create for family, friends, and their kids when they come to visit. We have a ton of yard work to do as it's pretty overgrown but we are taking things one thing at a time especially because my anxiety level was so high one day that I couldn't stop crying for the entire day. I was sure that I had made a hugh mistake but now I know that I haven't. The first floor of the house consists of living room, kitchen, laundry room, cousins bedroom, bathroom and kids/exercise room, oh and the bathroom. The second story is my extremely spacious bedroom and the adult guest room. We have a basement and while we are using it for storage it freaks both of us out to be down there. Let's see what else. Oh yeah, I have been in contact with my daughter's biological father and thought that perhaps there might be a rekindling of a love affair from 28 years ago. Nope, he's a jackass or as Mitch would say "he's a douche" and Mitch has threatened to kill any man that is a douche that I attempt to date. Sooooo, I still am not dating because just about the only men I know that aren't douche's are my boys, my brother, my father, my son-in-law and a few friend's husbands. Oh well, I am only 52 and 52 is the new 32, I'm told, so I have time to find the one man who will want to hold my hand when I'm 80 and hold conversations with me that are about nothing really other than the fact that we just like each other enough to talk about nothing. I'm still at the same job, three years into the new department that I created, and it's still going. I've made some new friends that have become "family" who come out for dinner every weekend. Jess is 31 and from Utah with no family here, and Stephanie is 20 who has family here but has never had "traditions" so we are helping to create those for her and her 3 year old son, who is a delight. I have become Jess's aunt because she is just a kind hearted, caring, do anything for you kind of person. My oldest son, Josh, and I have had a rough couple of years. We have gone up until about 3 weeks ago without speaking. He called because he needed a favor, which I was able and willing to provide and the other day he called inquiring about holiday plans. That gives me hope that our relationship can be repaired. My sister, who lives in Iowa, was out here for Christmas and we found a friendship that we have never had and she has become one of my most endearing friends. I broke a bone for the first time in my life in my right hand while trying to be a good samaritan and have gone through 4 casts because I refuse to keep them on. I know, how dumb does that make a 52 year old woman? Some would say really dumb, but I would say that the pain of the break is less of a hindrance than the damn cast. I have a high tolerance to pain although I know with certain movements it's still broke but I have full use of it. So call me dumb, I really don't care. I have been to Seattle twice this year for the first time ever. I went to the open air market (can't remember what it's called) and have seen the Puget Sound (I hope that's correct). So you can see that as I predicted in my last post at the beginning of this year that it has been a year of change and for the most part, very good change although yesterday was an extremely strange day. I got up, felt great, went to work, and by 10am could no longer stay awake. I was falling asleep while on the phone or eating, I just could not stay awake. Nothing different occurred the previous night that is different than any other weekday night. In addition, my voice has been hoarse for a month. So last night I was coerced into going to the doc by my daughter who threatened to not talk to be (she was one that I fell asleep while talking on the phone to her twice). I went to "A" doc, not mine because it was already to late in the day to get in to him. I was given a chest xray due to the length of the hoarse voice and told that my doc would call to set up a couple different tests for my inability to stay awake. The chest xray's did not thrill me because 9 years ago we lost my mother to small cell carcinoma lung cancer Mom's voice would go hoarse for no apparent reason from time to time and that's how she discovered she had lung cancer. I'm a smoker who has attempted to quit sooooo many times but just haven't gotten it done. The doc that I saw last night said that someone will probably call me today or my doc will call me on Monday to give the results of the chest xrays. I choose not to be anxious about it because I know that God has my back either way. So, let me just say again, that 2011 has been a pretty decent year in comparison to other years. I'm happy, I'm hoping that I'm healthy, I've got 4 beautiful grandbabies with another on the way. I have no complaints and I think this will be the first of many blogs that I will post throughout the rest of the year. I don't know how many, if any, of my friends still come back to this website but I'm back even if noone cares. Happy Saturday, August 20th, 2011.